hurt never means hardcore nor bitter

This is a pain like no other
A pain that I have never felt before
I know they say love hurts
But I didn’t know it felt like this
You see I’ve been struggling trying to overcome it
But it seems like them more I try the more it plummets on me
It’s crazy because it started out like a dream
Then I saw that it was really my reality…finally
But now I see the nightmare on Elm Street
Maybe that is a bit extreme but like a bee sting
The small things hurt worse than the large things
Some nights it’s hard to sleep
Some days it’s almost hard to breath
Because I’m used to your scent
Used to feeling your heart beat next to me as I sleep
Missing my phone singing “I can’t stay away from you too long”
Isn’t that funny because now you’re gone
The songs fit for the moment yet when that moment is over
Almost wish I had never heard it
Now here I am on the verge of hardcore and bitter
All because my heart is slightly broken
But I know that doesn’t mean I should close it
I’ll leave it open for _______ to resolve it
Because I know _______ will arrive one day
And I refuse to push _______ away
Because ______ may want to marry me
And that would be a shame to block that dream
All because of a heart break
So believe me the pain has scared me
But I’m pulling the cocoa butter out to heal me
Because I refuse to be that bitter woman most men have come to see
And who know he just may come back to me
But if I’m the anger bitter black woman I’m sure that he’ll leave
I’d probably leave me too
Because how can I ever appreciate happiness if I’m always so mean

when it's all over

your heart feels destroyed,
your emotions take control,
your mind is in a state of confusion,
yet your eyes know which way to go,
the love you came to believe was never ending,
ended...
tears begin to flow,
your heart aches more by the day,
yet with time you seem to grow,
this pain only came to make you stronger,
creating a new path to find a new journey,
while thinking of the right words to write the conlcusion to our love story,
unfortunately you don't have much to say,
or should i say not much nice to say,
but this conclusion is simple,
i just hope you agree but
i'm in love with you,
yet i'm also in love with me,
and me will never leave me,
it's impossible and hard to achieve,
so thanks for a beautiful love story,
but when it's all over.....Goodbye...

-c.martin

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Genuine Lovers

a touch of a hand of love
that feeling that can't be explained
intertwined at first sight
for only their feet walk their path of love...
to soft kisses on a cheek feeling like a cool ocean breeze
the serenity of a voice that speaks just before you begin to weep
the lips that speak only the truth
into an ear that is waiting to listen
for love to knock...
on a heart that is waiting to beat
and a soul that is waiting to feel
irreplaceable moments of peace...joy...happiness
staring into sparkling eyes of honesty
that remarkably feels your pain
who's mind thinks constantly
of that one being...faithful
is how it is suppose to be...
yet will it be...she or he...both
is how it should be...eternity
is what is expected in unity...us..we..
genuine lovers

heart vs mind vs soul

is this my heart speaking,
or is it my soul that leads me,
or is it my mind that is undecided...
my heart is ready for love so is it in a rush...
or is it my soul that is crying out for someone...
or maybe because my mind is thinking all of the time...
yet i am willing to wait for that YOU
for that one who accepts me for me
and i accept he for he,
yet my heart....or wait...my soul...or no...it's my mind
that makes me think so hard til I get lost
in this mass of confusion that breaks my...
my soul...no wait thats wrong....breaks my heart,
which is beating continuously searching like a radar to find YOU,
yet it finds...well nevermind...just know it's not YOU...
then comes my heart or wait my soul,
tries to reach deep down inside to find if you're "mr. right" inside of "mr. wrong"
hmph....or "mr. wrong" inside of "mr. right"
all because this heart of mine is pacing
and this mind is racing
yet my soul is steadily awaiting for YOU
but i find myself in the wrong direction...wrong connection...
so i'm back to this heart vs mind vs soul thing again..
because my heart...no my mind...or is it my soul
that is confused...
which is which...how do I decipher between the them while in the midst,
of love until my mind begins to think,
and heart begins to search again...
yet my soul is the only one that leads me to YOU...
but for some reason I am in this fight,
this fight between my heart.mind.soul...
when I know only my soul will steer me right...to YOU

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/MissLine

how does your heart beat

i think you should let me inside of you
i want to feel how your heart beats
see you've been inside of me
deep within my body to where i can't speak
i can only stare, inhale and exhale
and finally a sound speaks
as you're slowly stroking me
i vulnerably let you take over my body
as your lips kiss me softly around my body
my spine grows weak
because you're pleasing so passionately
then suddenly i realize i'm not sure how your hear beats
for you it is easy to see
yet for me i can hardly see
so as you sleep i place my hand on your chest
hoping to feel a few beats
while your eyes are closed and you don't notice
because you keep hiding this feeling from me
then suddenly i realize that i shouldn't have to guess
how your heart beats for me
so i leave....